R.I.P. Swampy

We lost a true pioneer in the medical marijuana field a few days ago...He was also a dear friend.

Swampy passed away from complications of cancer among other ailments. He was one of the people using the Rick Simpson oil to treat his cancer. It did work while he was using it, however as his illness worsened a conflict arose between his prescribed medications for his blood, and the vegetable oil used in the process of making the Simpson Oil. I'm not exactly sure what the issue was, but he could no longer continue to use both.

We found out on the way to our compassion club meeting. I was so shaken, and it was difficult not to make an announcement at that nights meeting in his honor but it had only been a matter of hours since his passing and a lot of his family had not been notified yet so we kept it quiet out of respect.

After the meeting we held an after meeting around the campfire. In attendance was swampy's caregiver who helped him in the end. We smoked in his honor and tears filled my eyes as I stared up into bright star lit sky. I know he was watching us smoke the strain he created, Free Leonard.

He told us something I will never, ever forget. Swampy smoked an ounce of marijuana a day to self medicate and treat his illness'. This was common knowledge. When he got ill and had to be hospitalized he could not smoke anything, and that is when he lost his battle.

DAMMIT - MARIJUANA IS A MEDICINE GIVEN TO US BY GOD. LET US USE IT TO SAVE LIVES !!!

Ripped !

Well, the leaders meeting came and went in Lansing. I was not too impressed with the information. They were bluntly honest in saying that they knew we were all looking for answers and direction, but that they could only give us the information they had and that information was changing day to day.

This meeting also left me with a great deal of confidence in what I am accomplishing. I used to kind of feel that I was really the newbie in all of this. I had never grown a plant and I really didn't know the growers lingo. I felt lost a lot of the time. I kept on with the club though, mostly faking it and it pretty much always worked out. What I realized last week was that I am right on par with most of these other club leaders. They have the same questions I do, in other words they are just learning too. I feel better. I can do this. I am doing this, and it's working.

Now, some bad news. A board member from our club got his plants ripped last night. He was two weeks away from harvest and they took everything that was ready. They picked the lock and took off through the back woods. No physical damage, but he lost $10,000 dollars worth of plants. I am so sick over this. He has patients that have been waiting for their meds for months and now he has nothing to give them. The police were called and came out to make a report but nothing beyond that so far.
I'll keep you posted as this progresses.

For now, our next meeting is scheduled for this coming Wednesday. We're ready to go with announcements and such. We're searching for board members and volunteers to help us grow. It's taking off and I'm on for the ride.

Talk to you soon.

Tomorrow's The Day!

Tomorrow we have the leaders meeting in Lansing. There is quite a buzz going around and it looks like there will be a strong turnout. Heh, imagine a bunch of well medicated potheads sitting in a room trying to argue. Makes me laugh.

So I am going with my two friends who run the club with me. They are a couple of great guys and we really seem to get along well. We have our questions well thought out and we will come away from this meeting with a much better sense of where we can go with our compassion club.

Got my meds, I'm good to go. My baby is doing well too. Growing strong!

See ya.

staying focused

I'm trying to focus on the harvest and I have put the brakes on buying any more meds so I can put my funds into my grow room. It's bad...Really bad. Fuck. I want to relax. We have the compassion club leaders meeting next Saturday in Lansing. I'm really looking forward to meeting all of the other leaders and seeing where I am on level with other clubs. This will also be the time to decide if we are going to sanction our club under the MMMA. If we do then we can start applying for funding. I will admit, it will be vital that I be medicated before I walk into that meeting. That is the only way I can think before I speak, and I have to make a great first impression. Wish me luck!

Christmas Tree

I got a great gift the other day, a six week old white widow plant. I have her under the light and she is doing quite well. The log book is in place and we are a go! My initial goal when starting was to be able to go to my room Christmas morning and enjoy some sweet bud from my own plant. Looks like it's going to be a very merry Christmas. I also stopped by the fish store and got new plants for my aquarium. I really enjoyed putting them in last night, it's been awhile since I've felt like doing the things that bring me peace. I have some Free Leonard meds right now, and I really, really enjoy them. This is the strain that was developed by swampy, a friend of mine, in honor of Leonard Peltier. Swampy is now very sick with throat and lung cancer. He is being treated with some of peanut butters oil that I talked about in my last post. It shrank his tumors. It's documented and I pray that someday that documentation will be used in a medical journal. I'll post a pic soon of my plant. Have a great last holiday weekend of the summer. Personally, I love this time of year best. The kids go back to school Tuesday. Can't wait!

Peanutbutter's Oil

This man is amazing. Please take the time to watch.

Random Happenings

Well we had our second compassion club meeting and it went just about perfect. I managed to snag an awesome guy from the MMMA board of directors and even though he showed up late he stepped right in and made the meeting shine. We had over thirty people in attendance and the next meeting is already scheduled. After the meeting was over I got some more white widow from the same guy. I'm regretfully finishing the bag soon as this was much, much better smoke. I don't know what was different but this did not make me evil like the last bag. This guy went to Oregon for most of the month, and his son tended and harvested some of the crop so maybe that made a difference. I don't know. What I do know is that we need to seriously get something growing. Christmas is my goal to harvest and we need the money for the holidays as well. I also know that the way I have been feeling the last couple of days is the way I could be feeling every single day for the rest of my life. Finally good meds that I can grow myself. Time to get in gear. Talk to you soon.

Busy

Sunday morning again...how are you doing? I've got my coffee and my joint as usual, although today they are combined. I bumped my coffee onto my desk and my joint. I love my wake and back with my coffee more than any time of the day. So much has gone on in the last two weeks! The compassion club meeting is still a go, and I really need to make it shine. I managed to snag the elusive Brad, a director with the MMMA to come to my meeting and help. Great impact to have him present. I've got my agenda started...however a phone call from another board member last night reminded me that time is short. He has another cookout/business meeting planned for today so maybe I'll head out there. Last time there was a huge hookah there that I enjoyed immensely. Our home grow room is not progressing so well. We just can't come up with the extra five or six hundred dollars we need to start. I think that Chris is even more bummed than I am. He sits and watches all these youtube videos of how to grow these huge sticky buds, then he goes down into the basement and just stares. We have got to get this going soon though if I'm going to have my Christmas tree bud. That's my wish, to wake up Christmas morning, go downstairs and open the door to my present. I have more great news. I mentioned that I had recconnected with an old friend up North and that she was not well. I needed to take my daughter to my parents house last weekend. I forgot that cell phone service is hit and miss up there, but I was determined to give my friend Chris ( yes, another Chris) a hug. I knew what street she lived on, and a description of the house. So I made a guess, pulled in and had a wonderful visit. I missed her so much! Truly one of my good, good friends in my life. The best part of the news...She was my first patient that I assisted in getting their medical marijuana card. She had no idea what a compassion club was, or that out of the whole Northeast area one met literally one street over from her house on a monthly basis. I happened to know who the person running this club was, so I shot him off and email and asked how he could help. Ironically the same day he offered his help and mentioned a clinic where Chris could fax her information instead of traveling to the clinic along with a person of contact, I also received an email from an ad I had placed on craigslist. It was the same person of contact from the same clinic offering her her assistance. The emails came within hours of each other. That's how our friendship has always been, a little too ironic. This is how it's supposed to work. Compassion clubs working together for the good of the patient. I'm still busy with the community garden as well. Board meetings, walking the neighborhood looking for property. I'm really enjoying this project and I'm looking forward to forming my non profit as well. Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. I got engaged! Chris got down on one knee in the Kitchen and formally proposed. No ring. I want a grow room!

White Widow...Check

Good Morning. I'm sitting here on Sunday morning before church with my ever present cup of steaming sugar laden coffee and a joint of the illusive white widow weed I had wished for so bad. Ya know, it gets me really high, but it also makes me feel not so, ummm...Right. I'm really hoping that it's a fluke. That the stress of my life is overtaking my ability to relax, even with meds. I really don't have an answer yet. A lot of give and take has gone on in the area as far as compassion clubs. The guy running the club down the road with the smoke room finally got his ass handed to him big time. Inspectors and city councils didn't quite agree with his vision. I guess I should have remembered my own motto "You do it to yourself". Yes. This person had gotten under my skin in a huge way. He was a great cause of my stress. So with this news I gave a little. Well, a lot. John, a person I swore to never work with again, is now my partner in the compassion club he started. I backed off, took his name and we now have Greg back as our third and they have both agreed to let me take the lead. We all sat around the campfire medicating a few days ago. It was good. Swampy, who was our fourth is sick. He has fluid in his lungs and apparently he cannot medicate any more because coughing makes his back hurt. A close to home reminder that this is why we are here. To help the sick and dying with their pain, it just hurts when it's one of your own. My own health. Not so good. I still can't find a physician. I ended up in the emergency room again with sever pain in my back. I won't go any further than to tell you that the physician I saw heard the words chronic pain and refused to listen any further. He responded by telling me that he had migraines, and did I know how many times he had been to the ER with his migraines? well, no I didn't, nor at that moment did I give a crap. He condesendingly told me none, and told me that I should not be their either. He did run tests to appease me. Then he gave me a prescription for over the counter motrin. Yeah. Fuck you and your hospital for lying to me and telling me you no longer could prescribe narcotic medicine for pain. So on we go. Today I am going to a BBQ to meet some business people from around the state who can help our club prosper. I also have some awesome news. I googled and located and old friend of mine. She was the first person who taught me the internet and let me come over and use her computer way back in 1998. We would sit and smoke pot and giggle for hours. I love her so much that when she fell very ill, I signed her living will. She lives with, and is now married!!!!!!! to a wonderful man who takes very good care of her. In her message back she says she is now confined to a hospital bed. I'll keep you posted. Just one more thing. I made a presentation to the board of directors at the church donating the land for my community garden vision. I think it's a go! I named it the solace community garden. It's 40'X 50' and it's all mine. Peace

Approved

YES! Yesterday was the day. Chris and I went to the THCF clinic and I got my physicians signature and I am now legal to possess, use and cultivate medical marijuana. I cried. I'll admit it. It was so easy to go through the process. First you go in and the office is decor is to die for! They have huge vividly colored prints on the walls, all close up's of various strains of buds. Of course my phone died as soon as we got there but we got some great shots on Chris' phone and as soon as we figure out how to get them on here I will post pics. They take you to a room and ask you to fill out some paperwork, then you go into a side room and start to watch a video telling you about growing, using and protecting yourself from law enforcement. I was called in to the next office after about five minutes. This next guy was cool. He told us his name and we instantly clicked. He explained that he was going on a radio show this week and that he would be part of the traveling clinic coming to Flint and Saginaw later in the month so we made plans to advertise for him in this area to find patients. Then we went into see the a nurse and my vitals were taken. She was really nice. My blood pressure was good she put the stethescope up to my back and told me to take a deep breath and as soon as I took a breath I started to cough. I was so congested from smoking so much crap weed lately. She asked me how much I smoked, and I of course asked her of what? she laughed and said tobacco, I smiled and said sorry. No. I really don't smoke cigarettes. In the end we agreed to put down half a pack of tobacco a day and she highly reccommended that we invest in a vaporizor because this would allow for 95% use of the medicine along with no congestion. Then we went into the physician. He asked about my pain and we chatted for a few minutes. I really held my breath right up until the second he signed his name at the bottom of the form. Once we were done he wished us luck and handed me my chart. APPROVED!! I made it to the front desk again, took a few more pics and we went to thank the front desk guy one more time. That's when I lost it. I started crying because this was such a relief and I was truly thankful. He smiled and gave me the biggest hug ever. I came home and celebrated with my doors wide open. This morning my coffee was the best because I could medicate with my windows wide open and I was safe and protected. Anyway thanks for sharing in one of the best days of my life. It was so stressful that I slept like a log last night. Nice to have some peace in my life. I have meetings to plan and patients to find. Things are falling into place.

I'm Off....

Today's the day. I'm off to get my doctors signature at the THCF clinic. I'll be legal in a matter of hours! I have waited my whole life for this day.

White Widow

FROM THIS TO THIS ..... IN UNDER A MINUTE I forgot to tell you. I posted a pic a while back of the white widow, and the guy I visited last week is growing a few white widow plants which are just beginning to bud. They are sweet. He told me I am so getting some of it when it's ready. I get a clone too. Giggity !!

Breathe

Things are better now. Without meds I just can not function and it shows. I could have cared less about this blog or my cause. It's almost harvest time here in Michigan. I've seen a few grow rooms and all I can say is wow! I hope that my own grow room looks that impressive a year from now. I'm trying to put our compassion club back together with the core three of us that started it. I visited with G the other day and he agrees that J has no place in our organization. I don't think S will have too many objections. I am going to go ahead and put together an agenda that I think will work for everyone and present it within the next month. Tomorrow I go and see the doctor about getting my card! I am so excited but I won't breathe until we're in the parking lot tomorrow. I just cannot believe that it's finally my turn after all these years. Wish me luck!! Chris and I have been seriously discussing (again) where we want to take this business. We know we want to grow, but that won't be enough. Chris is talking about starting a service to help the homebound by going to their house and helping them fill out and mail or fax their paperwork. He also wants to help them by taking them to their physician, or to the THCF clinic to get their paperwork signed. Some people still need help and we want to help them. Myself. I'm starting to narrow my cause. I am talking to people and getting information as to how to get mental illness added as a qualifying condition in Michigan for the use of meds. Wish me luck here too. Lots to do today. My daughter goes on a week long mission starting this afternoon. A group of teenagers will be ministering to the homeless of our city of Saginaw for the next week while living at the church completely unplugged from all electronics. I am so proud of Her. She is an angel from God with a beautiful heart. I have to go and buy my share of the groceries to feed these teen animals. Have to laugh when I was looking at how much meat was needed to feed twenty people someone pointed out that if you are buying for teenagers, you might as well double everything because they can eat! How true is that? Yeah, I added a few extra of everything to my list after that. I do love shopping. See ya later!!

Compassion Clubs

Compassion Clubs are meant to be filled with people who are compassionate. People who want to help people get their cards, help them to set up their own grow room or just make a few new friends. Lo and behold less than three months into the new law the money hungry idiots are already out in full force trying to ruin it for the rest of us. I have on my sidebar a link to the MMMA site. This is where I see these people at work for their own benefit. Coming out of the gate and being one of the first members I thought this site was the bomb. It was going to be THE place to get your information. Now I am not so sure I would recommend the site. The argument starts at whether being a caregiver will provide enough money to support yourself. This question has no answer because not everyone needs the same amount of money to live per year, and the price for caregiver services is negotiable between the caregiver and patient. Now remember, you may enlist a caregiver to grow your plants for you, and you are paying that caregiver for the service of growing your plants. You are not paying for the product that the plant produces. That being said, there are people on the site who just won't be mindful of the law and they put up posts offering 1/4 oz for $$ , 1/2 oz for $$ and so on. This is illegal. These are the same people who have no intentions of getting their caregiver cards and acquiring patients legally....They just want to sell some pot man. There was one guy on there today doing just that. He was like "Man, I got the best shit for cheap prices!" He was accusing others of ripping people off by charging four times what he was going to charge. I was actually the first to call him out on his post and play stupid by asking him if he really meant to present it that way. The next poster told him outright he was doing it illegally. Then there was a post in support of this guy by J. J told him it was a great idea to sell his stuff this way. Told him to ignore the haters... Gave the guy his name and email address right in the post and told him he would love to work with him. As the responses to the post grew and turned into a second post it came out that the original poster was a twenty three year old drug dealer who had no knowledge or intentions of helping anyone but himself. He ended up attacking another female member in his post and called her some horrible names and made crude sexual references to her body. The posts were pulled and the posters last words were pretty much FU to anyone who didn't agree with his ways. This idiot J is the reason I am writing this post. First of all think about it. He had no reservations about giving this guy his personal contact information in a public forum. He saw someone else interested in making money and didn't want to miss out. I was the secretary for the local compassion club with two other people. J pushed his way in there and took over the last meeting using it for his own agenda. He spouted of some crap about how if we would all join his co-op and do it his way then no one would ever have to run out of meds or pay high street prices. I sat at my table and was so pissed because this is not what I was there to promote. It was not legal and it was not for anyones benefit but his own. After the meeting I was invited to his house. He was relentless as he paced in his own living room spouting profit numbers, dates and whatever else he could come up with to get me to part with my money. He even took me downstairs to see his grow room. It was nice. Back upstairs he watched as I put out some money for meds from the other leader of our club, he then tried to sell me some seeds. I explained that I was not going to plant anything until I was legal so I really didn't need them, but that didn't stop him from trying again, and again...And again. I finally understood a few minutes later as his wife poked her head in the room and asked him if they were going to visit his dad later in the day. Without missing a beat he replied that they could, but he would have to come and get them all because he didn't have any gas money! Wow. guess selling me those seeds for cheap was his last chance for cash. I found out a little while later that he told another person his wife had no knowledge of his grow room. The same grow room I stood next to her in a week prior. I also found out the reason he is pushing so heavily to get patients... He didn't have any at the time I was there, but he had a grow room getting ready to harvest. Oops. No patients and lots of product = pure profit if he can fast talk people into buying his story. Hence he is using the website and the compassion club as his sales floor. Long story short. The two clubs have split and J and G have gone their own way, and S and I have gone another. It looks like as time goes on J is not going to give up. He continues to give compassion clubs a bad name by acting greedy on the website and not caring about what is legal. Sadly he is hardly the only person out there doing this just for profit. I don't think you can make a living being a caregiver. It would take a large scale operation outside of the home with many more plants than one person could handle. It would also take out all of the compassion, and that is what I love most about this law. Helping people. I made a promise to one person just last Saturday at our compassion club meeting. He is elderly and on a fixed income but he needs meds. I am going to help find him a caregiver that really cares about him. All I want is to see him smile and be free from the pain. I would love to make lots of money. Who wouldn't? But what would make me truly happy is to have the assurance I will never ever have to go without meds again for the rest of my life. To me, that is winning the lottery.

In the blink of an eye

It's been awhile since I posted. 

I haven't had any good meds for awhile now. Without them I simply cannot function. I need medical marijuana to live my life. If I don't have it things are bad. Very, very bad.

I am on my way to Southfield July 6th to get my papers signed for my card. I was supposed to go in June but money ran short and the water pump in the van took a dump. It devastated me to miss that appointment. There is nothing on this earth that is going to keep me from going to this next appointment, so if you happen to see a wild haired hippy chick on the side of the freeway thumbing it to Southfield that day...Please have some compassion and pick me up eh? 

I have to share this too. The day before I missed my appointment our beloved dog Gizmo got out of the house. He had alzheimers pretty bad, and if he got past the fence he couldn't find his way back. we spent all of Sunday and Monday searching the city streets. We used craigslist to get the neighborhood involved and Tuesday night we got word that he was spotted by the on ramp to the freeway. He had been hit and had died. Gizmo was a member of  our family for twelve years.   It was horrible. 

Later that week I had an appointment with my regular physician to go over the test results of my EMG.   My other half has been frustrated for awhile watching me go to the Dr. over and over and nothing changes. So being the loud guy from Brooklyn, NY that I fell in love with he has called the office and spoke up on my behalf several times. When I am in a lot of pain I guess he speaks just a little louder than they would like. 

The result... I was told if I felt they weren't doing a good enough job with my health, and if I wasn't happy, then maybe I should find a new Dr., and just like that, I was released.

Well Fuck !!

So I'm trying to find another Dr.   I really don't want to talk about it right now.  

So with all of that frustration going on along with not having good meds I have fallen apart. I have been yelling and screaming at anything that moves. My relationship may or may not be over at this point... Bless Chris for being strong when I am losing it. I am so mean to him and I can't help it. I don't mean it and he knows it but I am telling you that I am truly mentally ill and marijuana is the ONLY thing in this world that will calm me down enough to even be reasonable and rational. I get manic, and when I get manic I cannot think straight. My brain is not my own and the words and actions that I express are vindictive to anyone and anything. I get severe panic attacks that make me physically ill.  To give you an example... I changed my direct deposits from our joint bank account into my own account. I threatened to call child protective services on Chris and tell them he was a pedophile so that he could never have visitation with his twelve year old daughter again.  I threw a kitten. He's ok. I broke things in raging anger.

My parents left with my kids  after driving two hours to get them late this afternoon. My son called them last week crying while I was fighting with Chris. He's sixteen and he's seen this behavior come out of me far too much over the years. In a moment of clarity I had Chris call them and ask them please to come and take them for a few days.  I just need a break.

The mania is still running strong right now. I have had relief twice thanks to a dear compassionate friend who invited me over and smoked joint after joint of high quality meds with me. It calms me down like no other medication could even touch. Case in point, one of the visits was on fathers day.  On the way home from our friends house I felt so awesome that I asked Chris to pull over so I could give him a *ahem* proper fathers day present.   Yeah, it makes that much of a difference when I smoke. When I wasn't high anymore, the bitch was back.

I'll be back strong when I get some money and get some meds.  My friend is coming over soon to help me start my own grow room downstairs and I am stoked. His plants are just starting to bud and as I stood there looking at it my mouth was watering because I know that some of that harvest is gonna be mine!!!!!  And he has offered to help me from start to finish so I never, ever, ever, ever have to go without meds again. Thank you so much S.  Get this... S...The guy I just met who is helping me...our fathers were delivered by the same country doctor in my lil hometown of less than 500 people two hours away. His dad was delivered on a kitchen table, my dad probably was too.

God has a great sense of humor.

Peace

It Still Belongs In the Box

So the church service I attend is contemporary.  It's a come as you are service with a live band and a large screen with the words and moving graphics so there is no need for hymnals.They darken the room and jam for the first forty-five minutes every Sunday.

After this part is done, and the room is still darkened the Pastor stands from his seat in the fourth pew back.  He begins with a prayer, and then two ushers take wireless microphones around and if you would like to publicly proclaim what is on your heart that morning you are more than welcome to express yourself. After that, Pastor holds a locked box which contains private prayers that are never looked at and are shredded directly after the service. We pray for what is in the box as well.

I am so thankful to God for allowing my state to legalize medical marijuana. I am so thankful that He has allowed me to obtain my card so easily. 

God made marijuana. It is a plant in the ground designed by him.

So.... Would it be improper to thank God publicly in a contemporary service for helping us to live a pain free life legally?

I'm not trying to make this a political discussion by any means. I'm just afraid of being that middle aged coo-coo head that people talk about because I speak out about what I believe in.  I mean, now that I'm legal does it make it right for me to just throw it into every day conversation just because I can?  Uhh, no. Can you say uncomfortable?  Although I'm seriously considering thanking the mail man in some kind way on the day he brings my card, and yes I will tell him why. 

I just answered my own question, and wrote a title for this post. Yes, it still does belong in the locked box. Sorry God.  But I really do not think that most people are not ready to openly discuss middle age moms using medical marijuana. Sadly, I don't think that even in a contemporary church service it would be welcomed. I kind of think afterwards I would be pulled aside and nicely asked to not be so open... At least for awhile. To be fair though, I couldn't get away with it at the PTA meetings either. They would never let me have anything to do with bake sales again!!

Tomorrow night is a city wide prayer event at our local events center. They are hoping for a very large turnout to pray for our city and of course anything and everything else.  Let's see what gets thrown out there tomorrow, you never can tell!

White Widow. The strongest weed in the world.

Can you imagine?

Somewhere it's 4:20

Ha! 

7:20 Michigan = 4:20  California.

That's fucking cool. 

Thanks Chris for pointing this out. You rock.

And it was just that easy

I'm legal.

Just like that.

 I told you I faxed in my paperwork Friday afternoon to the clinic in southfield and they called me tonight at 7:20 p.m. to make an appointment for me at their clinic. They asked how soon I wanted to come. Right now I made it for two  weeks out because the cost is $200.00, however, if there is any way we can afford it sooner I am off! 

I can not believe they called, and so quickly! Even after I made my appointment I asked the guy again if this meant I was approved. He laughed like he had heard this mixture of relief, disbelief, happiness,  and ecstasy with just a little bit of good bud thrown in more than a few times. 

How Rockin' of a fourth of July it would be to have my medical marijuana card in hand to celebrate! 

 I have waited for this day for twenty years.

How did you get here?

I feel like a pioneer.

Medical marijuana was made legal for card carrying members in Michigan in April of this year. I remember signing a petition about ten years ago in a local head shop to try to get this petition on the ballot. I really thought I would never see it happen in my lifetime, yet just last Friday, I myself submitted my own paperwork to the clinic so that I can get my own medical marijuana card. 

The compassion club meetings started a few months ago around here as well. We attended each and every meeting and I met some of the most awesome people I could ever hope to be friends with... Much less smoke a joint with. I also met people who truly depend on marijuana to live life on a daily basis.  I realized I was not the only one. Wow. For the first time in my entire life I truly felt compassionate about a cause. 

So I volunteered to be the secretary/treasurer of our local club.  This blog is going to follow the changes in peoples lives as more and more basements become beautiful green sticky grow rooms, maybe even my own.

Stick around and tell me how you feel about this issue.